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Oh, the cat got dead; we put him in a box

Dug a little hole and we covered him with rocks

Picked a couple dandelions, said a little prayer

Then we all went off to bed ‘cause we mostly didn’t care


But in the middle of the night, a dog started sniffin’

Was a Labrador retriever that belonged to Mrs. Griffin

And even though the cat was smelly and stiff

He thought it’d be a nice addition to Mrs. Griffin’s kitchen


Well throughout the house she has cat curiosities

With kitties on her couch and her coat and her colostomy

People gave her kitty gifts, but all the dog could afford is

A cat he dug up with a case of rigor mortis


When the woman saw the cat, there began the pandemonium

The dog dropped the cat and it clunked to the Congoleum

It snapped back to life right there on the linoleum

Shook its shaggy head out of its catatonium


From the floor to the counter and all around the kitchen

The cat was chased by the dog, and the dog by Mrs. Griffin

Past the living room couch with a kitty motif

Through the front door screen out into the street…


Well old John Duke drives a delivery route

And he happened to be passing with a van full of fruit

He missed the woman and the dog but his face went pale

‘Cause in a splat the cat was corned beef hash with a tail


Oh, the cat got dead; we put him in a box

And we dug a little hole and we covered him with rocks

And we picked a couple dandelions, said a little prayer

And we all went off to bed ‘cause we mostly didn’t care

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